Sunday, May 9, 2010

I hate Mother's Day

I really miss my Mom everyday but on Mother's Day I am reminded how much of my life she has missed and that she never got to meet 4 of my kids. My Mom was an alcoholic and it makes me mad that she is gone. I wish I could just call her and talk.

Don't get me wrong- I love being a Mom- but for me Mother's Day is about My Mom.

I have Step Mom that has been in my life since I was in Fourth grade and I am appreciative of her- but I still miss my Mom.

I miss the little things like:

Calling her anytime day or night

Her cooking

Talking to her about anything

Her smile

How she loved me despite anything I did

The sound she made when she cleared her throat (weird I know)

Watching her get ready

Her handwriting on letters she wrote me

How excited she was to have a Grand baby

How much she loved cats

Her smell- Chanel #5

Just having a Mom

I love you Mom and I miss you like crazy! RIP


  1. Oh Kate, this makes me heart ache more than you could possibly know.

    Ok, well, maybe you do know.

    Im sure you read about one of my best friend's tragic news..her losing both her parents on May 5th.

    Every single day I go on to wonder what its going to be like for her to not be able to call her Mom next week, or next month...when it really sinks in that she wont get to just pick up the phone and call her when she needs to.

    I worry about her getting mad, just as you mentioned. I mean, I know she already is mad at her Mother for taking her own life...but what about in a month when she really is missing her Mom's voice even more? How mad is she really going to get?

    And not just her Mom, but her Dad too.

    I have so many hopes and fears for her. I wish so many things but most of all I wish I could be there for her.

    I wish she didnt have to wish and miss her Mom like you did here. Its not fair.

  2. I'm so sorry sweetie. This breaks my heart. I wish you could talk to your mom. Thinking of you. (((HUGS)))